Top Ten Boners of 2013: The IPC

Posted on by Zoë

Well, Eric over at The IPC provided a list that only he could, and in a manner and style that only he could… it was like bringing a mini but personal Shitfest to the table, but oh so grand! If you want rib-crackingly hilarious posts to read every day, something to bring some light into your day in some dark way, then I would highly suggest you go on over and check out Eric’s site if you haven’t already!

Should you be interested in submitting a Top Ten list, draw up a list of either your top ten personal favourite movies or a top ten list by a specific genre/theme and send it along to me at sporadiczoe@hotmail.com. Hope to see a few more lists!

the-ipc-13

*Please note good readers, in America the word “Boner” was once used to describe a stupid  mistake – or an error – before it nestled into its current use. Here are the top ten movie boners that I saw in 2013 (please note that I didn’t see every new release that came out).

poop

10) ELYSIUM

How disappointing! Such a good premise, such a good director! Such good special effects! Such poor delivery and execution. BAH HUMBUG!!

9) OZ: THE GREAT AND POWERFUL

YAAAAWWWWNNNNN Franco really is a sucky actor. Come on, people.

8) THE INTERNSHIP

WTF?? These guys need to hang it up. This bit has gotten so old it’s balls are droopy and wilted. Go away.

7) RED 2

I LOVED RED!!! WTF is this shit??? This was so incredibly boring and just plain stupid. Talk about overstaying your welcome. BOOO. PISS!!!!!

6) THE HANGOVER PART 3

Totally pointless, stupid, ridiculous and unnecessary. Eat shit.

5) PAIN AND GAIN

This was so dumb I couldn’t even stand it. In fact, the wife hated it so much we didn’t even finish it. Thank God.

4) GI JOE RETALIATION

Another one that was so dumb we didn’t even finish. Thank the gods of the east it was free.

3) BEYOND THE HILLS

Excuse my language but WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING??? An abomination.

2) ONLY GOD FORGIVES

If you have to ask, please see my thoughts here: http://isaacspictureconclusions.com/2013/09/12/shitfest-2013-fall-only-go-forgives/

1) THE LAST EXORCISM PART 2

One of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. An hour and a half of people bending over backwards. FUCKING TERRIBLE.

79 thoughts on “Top Ten Boners of 2013: The IPC”

    1. I thought we agreed to keep our peniles to ourselves???? I don’t need no Scottish junk up in here…..!

      Boat Drinks and Flatworms!!

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  9. Great list Eric, agree with most of them. I liked Oz and thought The Internship was slightly humorous. I grew up a kid of the 80’s so I can’t fault GI Joe or Transformers ever because of the nostalgia 🙂 Any of the other I’d seen were truly crap.

    regarding the original definition of the word boner. I recall being shocked as a kid seeing it in a Hardy Boy novel, so I looked it up. (the quote was something like that teacher really had a boner for Frank). I quickly learned that there were numerous meanings to some words 🙂

    Kudos to you Zoe, for allowing a title like that on your blog 🙂

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    2. Obviously I was thinking about something devious for this thing Zoe’s got going on and I remember seeing this used often in Archie comics when I was a kid. I remember being absolutely shocked that they got away with that.

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      3. Like when you could still say sourpuss without the world totally freaking (it is probably taken up worse here, don’t know how bad it is that side, but here people are like whaaaaaa). Or when Dick was still just a nickname.

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  10. I was honestly very disappointed with this post. I expected hot girls.

    But hey, once I got to reading it, it was actually awesome in the way only the awesome Eric can manage. 😀 Love your blog and features, Zoë!!

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  11. So. Franco. Can be brilliant (see his cameo in The Iceman, his work as James Dean, Pineapple Express and whatever else). He can also be awful, and Oz is Exhibit A.

    Great post, Eric!

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  13. Boners! omg I thought it was going to be a hot chick list. haha

    Good list! I agree with all of them although I liked Pain and Gain, yeah don’t throw tomatoes at me please.

    Elysium was the worst and Oz… WTF they should have put those 2 movies together and see what Shitfest of a movie comes out of that.

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      2. Dammit. I was tricked too. TRICKED! I was NOT expecting hot chicks, though. You could definitely find ten “boners” in films. (Look that video up from Twitter this morning, Eric!)

        Remember how the best friend on Growing Pains was called Boner? Oh wait – Eric won’t have watched that show….

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      3. We all know what YOU were looking for out on this post!!!

        I’ll try and remember too when I get home : )

        I watched a little Growing Pains when I was a kid….

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