Review: The Boy (2016)

“Be good to him and he will be good to you.”
– Mr Heelshire

SYNOPSIS: An American nanny is shocked that her new English family’s boy is actually a life-sized doll. After she violates a list of strict rules, disturbing events make her believe that the doll is really alive. – via IMDB

Okay, so I wasn’t expecting greatness from The Boy. I was expecting a run of the mill horror, as it is so rare to find a great one nowadays. I know the reviews for this came back harshly, and now I can totally understand why. Initially I was thinking it couldn’t really be that bad. Wrong. It can be. It starts off as nothing too serious, and it is okay, nothing we haven’t seen before, but enough to keep you entertained. However, before you can blink your eyes and catch up properly, the movie has totally derailed into something so ridiculous and absurd, you can’t even suspend logic for the sake of the horror movie. For reals.

I am all on board with trying to do something a little different and all that, but come off it! This was one movie in the first half and another in the second, and it was so stupid, no less. Plot twist my foot! Ugh. I get what they were trying to go for, I do, and I get why they would have wanted to, but this was just not right, it wasn’t handled well (in my opinion, that is). It could have played off in so many different ways. The writers never really embraced their concept and didn’t go all out for it – the premise is bizarre as is, they should have just gone for it, used it! Instead, it just falls flat, something that technically could have been so much more. What a waste of time.

Cohan does what she can with the role, but the script is so uninspired as it is, there is not much you can really do with it. Then there is Malcolm, and he and Greta seem to work well, but nothing special. The movie is predictable and lives on a ton of horror clichés, until it tries to break the mould, and that is where things just backfired. Badly. Initially you do wonder about this doll, about Greta, about her psychological state, about the supernatural. Then the movie breaks from this, and it gets ridiculous. Ugh, I was just irritated with this silly movie by the end, and it was a supremely unsatisfying watch over and above it.

The Boy really had no idea what it actually wanted, and if the execution is what it was going for, it failed. I regret having wasted my time. Again, I didn’t expect the next Babadook or anything, but I didn’t think it could be that dreadful. It is. Skip it, if you are one of the lucky few that has not lost time on this crappy movie.