JB & The Chop Do: Saw VII: The Final Chapter (2010)

JB AND THE CHOP PRESENT SAW

This is it, the final chapter! Here we are, JB & The Chop, at another close to yet another franchise.

saw 3d the final chapter poster

SYNOPSIS: As a deadly battle rages over Jigsaw’s brutal legacy, a group of Jigsaw survivors gathers to seek the support of self-help guru and fellow survivor Bobby Dagen, a man whose own dark secrets unleash a new wave of terror. – via IMDB

jb saw

The final freaking leg folks – yes, pun intended! This was definitely not the most grueling franchise that Eric and I have ever covered, but it certainly was the nastiest! Anyway, final stretch here, let’s see how I felt about it.

First thoughts, right off the bat. Brad and Brian???? Guys, what did you do over there at Hard Ticket To Home Video???? Goodness!

I don’t know if I have just become super desensitized or something throughout the duration of these movies – but that opening act was lame. Also: “I think we’re breaking up with you Dina.” – I actually cringed. More so than usual. WTF?! This is just beyond sketchy.

Prior to this movie, all the victims had involvement with Kramer and what went wrong in his life. These victims? Nope. No story provided for them, either, which is unlike this series. Another issue I had was the survivors – I honestly didn’t recognise most of the, so, uhm, what the hell? These traps were obviously not devised at the spur of the moment by Hoffman to hunt down Jill, I am sorry, I just cannot buy into that.

saw vii chester bennington

This final chapter is one of the most fucking useless movies I have ever seen. Don’t get me wrong, the previous six were not exactly a wealth of amazing movies or anything, but this thing? It is so stupid, and so pointless, and it looks awful! Even Saw, with its tiny ass budget, didn’t look nearly as horrendous as this. Let’s not even forget that fuck it, nobody must win in this thing, and the acting was atrocious. This movie didn’t tie in neatly with the rest, either, and sort of languished in the glory of the name of this franchise, but brought nothing to the table.

GORDON LIVES! WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUCK?! Finally, this is answered! The Chop and I have been wondering about this since the first bloody film!

Wow amityville

Ugh. to say that this movie was bland and formulaic is the understatement of the century. The fact that our “protagonist” was an asshole and let everyone die is so not a shocker. Ugh. What a freaking dweeb and a loser. The traps were also pretty unimaginative this time around (yes, now I must admit, watching these movies have desensitized me too much), and the movie takes forever to slog through the 90 minute runtime. The logic is also so damaged – not because the other six were brilliant, but at least the freaking things were more consistent than this pile of trash.

saw vii reverse bear trap;

I was actually getting a little antsy by the end though about Hoffman not paying for his deeds, because that would have pissed me right off. He is a jackass, and deserved to be punished, whether by legal system or… other means.

saw vii game over

Thanks to all of you for sticking this out with us, reading, commenting, and sharing the love/disgust/whatever. We will always appreciate you guys!

chop saw

This is it!! For now at least… god damn this movie sucked…. at least with the previous six they tried to make some sort of tie-ins. This time the dead Jigsaw is just killing random people for things like cheating on each other. And in public. And he seems to be dressing them in the worst fashion ever:

saw7a

I don’t know why this irritates me so much but it does. Who was in charge of the costume department that said “Let’s put these guys in matching overalls. All the kids today are wearing brown overalls.”

saw7b

Also – this opening scene was so fucking stupid I couldn’t stand it.

“I love you!! Kill him!!”

“You bitch!! I’ll kill you!!”

“No I meant I love you!! Kill him!!”

The fucking worst.

saw7c

I don’t even know what to say about this movie. Jigsaw is killing random people from beyond the grave. Again. Kill me now. Here’s our obligatory picture of Betsy Russell’s boobs:

saw7d

For some reason, Powder is in this and here are his boobs:

saw7esaw7fJB&TC2

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11 thoughts on “JB & The Chop Do: Saw VII: The Final Chapter (2010)

  1. emmakwall says:

    Very funny and I love the gifs!! That pink t-shirt boob girl was ridiculous (I thought that in the cinema) and is the skin guy the one from Linkin Park?

    Certainly the worst of the series, the 3D did it no favours either! Loved your series 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Zoë says:

      Yay! So glad you enjoyed it! She was freaking terrible, and yep, Chester Bennington from Linkin Park made some really arb contribution.

      It was such a terrible movie! I am so glad I didn’t see this in 3D.

      Like

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