Review: Crazy, Stupid, Love (2011)

“I have loved her even when I hated her… only married couples’ll understand that one…”
– Cal Weaver

SYNOPSIS: A middle-aged husband’s life changes dramatically when his wife asks him for a divorce. He seeks to rediscover his manhood with the help of a newfound friend, Jacob, learning to pick up girls at bars. – via IMDB

You know, the more I watch this movie, the more I enjoy it. I watched this years ago at the behest of Natasha, who knows I cannot really stand rom-coms, but does know what type I can deal with. When she told me to check this out, I figured why not? She won’t just recommend me anything in this genre, so it had to be decent. Plus two, the cast is fantastic. Let me tell you, this movie is great, and I grow constantly more fond of it. It is just so much fun.

I enjoyed that this was not some stupid, soppy, desperate love story. This looked at people who have lives that fall apart – midlife crises that aren’t dealt with, cheating, insecurities, all of it. It explores embracing yourself, letting other people in, dealing with issues head on, so many things. I enjoyed the themes of this movie. And yes, love is an extremely prominent theme, but it does not make you want to retch, so that is a good thing! Crazy, Stupid, Love knows what it is and what it wants to be, and goes with it. It is smart, funny, witty, and sweet, and I appreciated all those things.

Let us not even remotely forget the cast. Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone are absolutely phenomenal here, and have ridiculously amazing chemistry. Really, I could watch them all day together. This is one of two movies where Steve Carell does not grate on my last nerve, and Julianne Moore is, as always, well worth the watch. Kevin Bacon’s moments were also those of pure entertainment, especially as the movie progresses. What a boring man! Also, everyone worked well together. I particularly appreciated Jacob taking Cal out to begin their main training. Oh boy!

There were plenty awkward moments, plenty funny and plenty sweet, but everything works. This is the kind of romantic movie I can revisit without feeling just plain down ridiculous. There is a lot to like about it, and a movie you can get away with watching with your other half without them wanting to slit their wrists. As you can tell, I quite like this one for a variety of reasons, and I can highly recommend it.

Oooh, oooh, before I go. Women across the globe will thank Hannah for not letting him put his shirt back on after assessing his Photoshopped beauty. For science…

Skip the trailer, just go straight to the movie.

Rapid Review: The Hunger Games – Mockingjay Part II (2015)

“Our lives were never ours, they belong to Snow and our deaths do too. But if you kill him, Katniss, all those deaths, they mean something.”
– Peeta Mellark

SYNOPSIS: As the war of Panem escalates to the destruction of other districts by the Capitol, Katniss Everdeen, the reluctant leader of the rebellion, must bring together an army against President Snow, while all she holds dear hangs in the balance. – via IMDB

I was excited for this, I really was. I was unhappy with the split of this book into two movies, and it seems that that was justified. I just don’t quite get it… you all know I was not really a fan of Mockingjay Part I. It felt unnecessary, though it was interesting to explore some of the political issues there. Then there is Mockingjay Part II, and it is uneven, and a mess, and somehow manages to feel so rushed. I don’t get it. There are also things that really irritated me. The main two offenders being SPOILERS that Finnick’s death was not done more justice – because it was really just glossed over in the book, and that Prim barely featured, so her death  meant absolutely nothing here. The movie felt cluttered, and it was not nearly as smooth as Catching Fire, which remains the crowning moment for this franchise. I maintain that Jennifer Lawrence succeeded in making Katniss Everdeen far more likable than she ever was in the books (ask anyone – Everdeen is a total pet peeve of mine, ugh, whiny brat). This is not the worst way to end out the franchise, but really less oomph than I was expecting. Visually, of course, the movie was great to look at, but I was extremely disappointed in the pods at the outer edge of the city. Way less bang for my buck than I was expecting. The conclusion is also portrayed in a far more upbeat manner than the book, which is much better for me because the book made me want to throw it out of frustration because Katniss is such a selfish child. The trailer contained all the really good things, unfortunately, so there was spans of filler stuff (for me) while watching this. I feel that the cast again did a fantastic job with their characters, bringing all of them to life, though many characters were glossed over. Sam Claflin is still fantastic as Finnick Odair, Josh Hutcherson is precisely what you would expect Peeta to be, and Liam Hemsworth is a really good Gale, exactly what I pictured him to be (don’t know why he gets so much hate – but then I have only ever seen him in this franchise). That’s just glossing over the main cast, as it really is just too large to talk about them all, but just know that they all worked very well with what they were given. I liked this alright, but I did not love it – it just feels like it never really took off like it was supposed to. It felt unpolished, unfinished, and uneven. That being said, it is still a fun franchise, and I am totally looking forward to a nice box set to add to my collection!

Rapid Review: The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)

“Okay, so there is another island of dinosaurs, no fences this time and you wanna send people in, very few people, on the ground? Right?”
– Dr Ian Malcolm

SYNOPSIS: With the apparent public discovery of the ‘Site B’ production island full of dinosaurs, John Hammond assembles a team to visit and document the area before it is exploited by others. Included in the four man team are Dr. Ian Malcolm and his girlfriend, Dr. Sarah Harding. When the team reaches the island, they soon discover the presence of another group of people. This new group however are not there for biological data but instead have something more sinister in mind. After a series of events, both groups become stranded when all their communication equipment is lost. It is then that the terror really begins as both groups scramble for their lives. – via IMDB

Yes, I am aware I might catch some flak for this (but maybe not too much). Now, naturally when Jurassic Park is your predecessor, you have quite the big achievement to top. It is little wonder that, no matter how fun The Lost World is, it never hits the heights of the last one. Not that it is bad, it just cannot rival it. Anyway, to visit a new concept of an island with dinosaurs roaming freely was, of course, going to be a lot of fun. Pair that with the fact that you are bringing back the snarky Ian Malcolm, and you should have a winning recipe. You should, except that you threw in Julianne Moore’s Sarah Harding. A lot went downhill from there. What a bloody nuisance. There is no other way to look at her character at all. I mean, this is saying something because I really, really like Julianne Moore, but she worked on my nerves here. Goodness, she was silly and daft and just… no. Why?! Just, why?! A young Vince Vaughn was also entertaining, but despite all these things and a decent cast, things did not come together as well as one would hope. The movie feels like it never found its footing. Naturally a kid had to be dragged in here somewhere so that every kid in the world watching this had someone to identify with, which was great back in the day. However, now I am older and more grown up, and want to know exactly how the T-Rexes were convinced that they should just be patient, get baby, then strike back and toss them off the cliff? Not to mention (and I really, really need to know about this one) you have dinosaurs on Isla Sorna. They live there. They stay there. They won’t move. But you have flying species there, too, and no way to contain them on the island? How does this even make sense? It got a little out of  hand in places. Also, that ending felt very Man of Steel – it felt like it was over, setup for a new movie, but wait! There’s more! The T-Rex is taking the city! Oh well. Not the worst movie in the world but definitely not a highlight of Spielberg’s.

Rapid Review: Carrie (2013)

“Carrie had some sort of power. But she was just like me… like any of you. She had hopes, she had fears, but we pushed her. And you can only push someone so far before they break.”
– Sue Snell

SYNOPSIS: A reimagining of the classic horror tale about Carrie White, a shy girl outcast by her peers and sheltered by her deeply religious mother, who unleashes telekinetic terror on her small town after being pushed too far at her senior prom. – via IMDB

It is common knowledge that I am not the biggest fan of the original. I really think it is overhyped. It let me down, and most of the acting was embarrassing. I remember I was rather indifferent to seeing that Carrie was being remade, but I sort of had a corner in me hoping for something better. Maybe one day we will luck out and get a version of Carrie that has the documentary style woven in between the story itself, sticking more to the book than anything. Hey, we can all dream! Anyway, I started this movie knowing that it got slammed by a whole bunch of die hard fans of the original and some other people, and I must admit that I thought this was highly uncalled for. The 2013 Carrie remake turned out to be a pretty decent watch. However, whoever the hell did the makeup for this movie was awful – everyone looked much older than they were and orange and silly. The performances were all satisfactory, and Julianne Moore was fantastic as Margaret White. Chloë Grace Moretz was a little pretty in my opinion to play Carrie, but she did a great job regardless. I loved Ansel Elgort as Tommy Ross, he was much better in this movie, and he is cute as hell. Chris was a real mean bitch, and Alex Russell as Billy was also very well done, considering how much I liked him in Chronicle. I must say that this movie was decent, it was entertaining and it was shot well, and I liked it more than I expected to. I think the film did a really good job when it got to showing how things happened at the prom and thereafter, they got that down. It is not amazing, and it is still not the perfect version of Carrie, but worth checking out whether you are a fan of the original or not.

April Blind Spot Review: Children of Men (2006)

“As the sound of the playgrounds faded, the despair set in. Very odd, what happens in a world without children’s voices.”
– Miriam

SYNOPSIS: In 2027, in a chaotic world in which women have become somehow infertile, a former activist agrees to help transport a miraculously pregnant woman to a sanctuary at sea. – via IMDB

Well, well, well. I didn’t think I would dislike this movie as much as I did, as much flak as I may get for this. It came in recommended from my neighbour, though he said that there were a few scenes that the whole film basically hangs on. I didn’t realise that this movie had this mad love surrounding it and critical acclaim and all, and I went in relatively blind in terms of plot. It was evident in the first fifteen minutes that I was not going to enjoy it. I hated the camera work, it was jumpy and all over the show and gave me a headache. Then there was the dialogue, and I am sorry, there is nothing that will change my mind on the fact that I thought it was horrendous and awkward and didn’t flow right. There were more irritating characters than you could shake a stick at and the world may love Alfonso Cuarón but this was just not that great. It felt incredibly long, and I was ready to start bawling when I was sure we were nearing the final third, only to find that we were barely halfway. What annoys me is the fact that it had quite a good premise. It was interesting, it had potential, there were things to do and places to go and instead all that potential was squandered, and littered with bizarre and highly unlikable characters and events and things don’t flow properly. I was expecting some awesome plot twists, but none were delivered as promised. It was utterly predictable, and I was underwhelmed by the fact that the infertility issue was never explored more. Also, that ending! After all my pain and suffering, that’s how it went? Ugh. There were a few scenes that were done well and some things that were beautiful, especially when you think about it, but there were others with really flawed logic (such as a dude pushing a car all by himself, containing two women, along a muddy country round with hills). I feel that the cast was underused, as well. Julianne Moore and Michael Caine are big draw names (for me, anyway), and not much was really done with them when you get down to it. I know this is a pretty harsh review, but I was no fan. At all. And then when I saw the rave reviews and ratings coming back I was sure that I had missed something completely, and I did give this movie a fair shot. Overall, I was really hoping for more and instead I was left with this bitter taste  of disappointment, and that sucks. Really.

Sporadic Scene: Crazy, Stupid, Love (2011) – Family Reunion

Do not watch this if you have not watched the movie, it is a bit of a spoiler!

This scene is undeniably one of the very best things about Crazy, Stupid, Love. I mean it was wholly unexpected the first time I watched it and geniusly crafted, the family reunion had me in stitches. Everything that could go wrong, did go wrong, but it was handled with aplomb, and it definitely the standout scene of the movie. If you have not seen this yet, you have got to get to it!

If you have a scene that you would like featured, drop me a mail at sporadiczoe@hotmail.com with a picture/gif/video of the scene and an explanation as to why (should you want to include it).

Review: The Hunger Games – Mockingjay Part I (2014)

“I never wanted any of this, I never wanted to be in the Games, I just wanted to save my sister and keep Peeta alive.”
– Katniss Everdeen

SYNOPSIS: With the Games now destroyed and in pieces, Katniss Everdeen, along with Gale, Finnick and Beetee, now end up in the so thought “destroyed” District 13. Under the leadership of President Coin and the advice of her friends, Katniss becomes the “Mockingjay” and the symbol of rebellion for the people. – via IMDB

So we all know that the entire world has been waiting for this with bated breath and immense amounts of participation. The reviews came back, mixed. Very. Irrespective of, I had to go see this. Now that I am free of my exams, I could do this without stress and worrying about anything. Yay. Now, there are a lot of things this movie did right, and there were a lot of things that I was not fond of. There was a lot that they stuck to in the books, and other things that they certainly could have developed more that they just didn’t (big eyes here at the Gale and Finnick sections). I mean, Gale ended up looking like a jackass at a stage when he freaked about Peeta, simply because there was no proper build up. Haymitch was underused, and the fact that they dropped the Finnick in his underwear scene was criminal. I was not expecting a huge action film going in, knowing how they split the book into two films, I knew that Part I was going to be significantly slower (the first half of the book was, too). What I didn’t expect was it to feel like it was dragging, trying to fill up the runtime at the best of times. Pity, too. I don’t mind a slow burn or a drama or anything, but then those elements have to take over and keep you completely enthralled, which did not really happen here. I was not happy either when Finnick delivered his huge exposé speech either, because they kept punctuating it with the rescue scenes, which would have been fine (I mean I understood what they were going for), but they let those scenes drag on too long without Finnick talking or focused too much on the event punctuating his speech, so when he comes back and he’s saying something, you have forgotten what he has said already, and the OMG bit of all of it is underplayed, and it was an important bit. The performances from the cast were very good all round though. Julianne Moore was great as President Coin, Philip Seymour Hoffman was still a wonderful Plutarch, though I wish there had been more of him, Liam Hemsworth finally gets more screen time (though I still think they needed to do so much more with his character), and Sam Claflin was solid as Finnick as always, though I really wish we had seen more of him (the mistreatment of his character in here was criminal), and Elizabeth Banks was entertaining as always, though she was not really supposed to be such a big part of events. I liked her nonetheless. There were some logic issues that got under my skin (most of it having to do with the hiding in the bunker thing), and the shaky cam stuff annoyed me endlessly, too. I was happy that the reunions were done well (Finnick, Peeta, etc). I was worried they would manage to screw that up, but it worked wonders. Overall this is not a bad flick, it’s just that so much more could have been done.

 

Top Ten Actresses I Would Watch In Almost Anything

So when Abbi over at Where The Wild Things Are did her top ten list of actresses she would see in pretty much anything, that sparked a whole new thing on the blogosphere. Now, I am embarrassed to admit that I started this list soon after she did hers, and I just never got around to going back to it and finishing it up. I realised recently that now is the time to do that! Without further ado, I present to you my top ten actresses I would see in pretty much anything.

Emma Stone

Where is the love: She is cute, she is smart, fun, and sexy and so normal, you cannot help but love the girl. She is down to earth, and not afraid of making a fool out of herself, and that is always cool.
Best role: Wichita in Zombieland (2009)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: The House Bunny (2008)

Angelina Jolie

Where is the love: So many people complain about Angelina Jolie and I’ve never been able to understand it. She is exceptionally talented and wicked sexy, and works hard. She’s a (big) family woman, which is cool, yet she’s still grounded and out there. Plus she and Brad Pitt are just like the most gorgeous couple ever.
Best role: Uhm… this isn’t easy. I am going to go with Jane Smith in Mr & Mrs Smith (2005)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Kung Fu Panda 2 (2011)

Marion Cotillard

Where is the love: That voice, the way she carries herself, the distinct regal air, Marion Cotillard was destined to impress me. Not only that, she can handle herself in just about any role, but I must say that she excels at playing the slightly psychologically unstable.
Best role: Mallorie “Mal” Cobb in Inception (2010)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Taxi 2 (2000)

Eva Green

Where is the love: Talented and beautiful, Eva Green brings it all to the table. Oozing style and sophistication, she is captivating on screen, always bringing that extra little something to a character, and she isn’t afraid to go wherever the character may take her, even when that is Ugliesville.
Best role: Vesper Lynd in Casino Royale (2006)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: The Dreamers (2003)

Jessica Lange

Where is the love: Jessica Lange is just awesome. I really like her stuff, and I think she is mesmerising and she’s still got it going, even for her age. She dominates the screen whenever she is on, and can play anything from timid and quiet to in-your-face vixen.
Best role: Fiona Goode in American Horror Story: Coven
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Far North (1988)

Judi Dench

Where is the love: Let’s be serious… Judi Dench is just so British, and she embraces it wholeheartedly. Tea and biscuits British, and above all else, she is a solid and entertaining actress. She can play a variety of roles across the board, ranging from comedy to hard-hitting, take-no-nonsense powerhouse performances such as M, she never fails to impress me.
Best role: M in any Bond film, but also Evelyn Greenslade in The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel (2012)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: The Importance of Being Earnest (2002)

Carey Mulligan

Where is the love: She is so cute and quiet, but can always deliver an understated but powerful portrayal of a character, and I like that talent.
Best role: Irene in Drive (2011)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: And When Did You Last See Your Father? (2007)

Helena Bonham Carter

Where is the love: Ditzy, crazy, talented, striking? What’s not to love about Helena Bonham Carter? She embraces all her roles and lends them some of her quirkiness, and she is always just absolutely astounding to watch, no matter what role she is in. Something about her is just so inherently different.
Best role: Marla Singer in Fight Club (1997)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Dancing Queen (1993)

Mia Wasikowska

Where is the love: Mia Wasikowska won me over with her portrayal of Bertha Minnix in Lawless (2012). After that, I kept my eyes open for her films because she is gifted and different, and brought something fresh and new to the screen (in my opinion). She has continued to churn out some consistently impressive work, and she has this air of innocence about her she can use to either define a character, or manipulate the audience with.
Best role: India Stoker in Stoker (2013)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Lens Love Story (2007)

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Honourable Mentions:

Julianne Moore

Where is the love: I love Moore for her consistency, and how much effort she puts into her roles. I like the way she has played such a variety of characters, and she has given each and every role her best.
Best role: Clarice Starling in Hannibal (2001)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Nine Months (1995)

Cate Blanchett

Where is the love: Blanchett is so refreshing in her sense of uniqueness, and brings that to life on the screen with every role that she takes. She draws you in no matter what her role, and can play anything from elvish queens to folk rock stars.
Best role: Jade Quinn (Bob Dylan) in I’m Not There (2007)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Ponyo (2009)

Katharine Isabelle

Where is the love: Katharine Isabelle is undoubtedly the horror queen (for me) and she dominates that role. Husky voice and those big green eyes, she was destined to rock any role thrown her way. She is a solid actress, never over the top, delivering just the right amount required for her performances, able to play weak or bitchy or in your face, Isabelle is very talented.
Best role: Mary Mason in American Mary (2012)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Cousins (1989) 

Mélanie Laurent

Where is the love: French and proud about it, Laurent always manages to play a brooding yet strong woman, slightly different, always impressive.
Best role: Shosanna Dreyfus in Inglourious Basterds (2009)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Rice Rhapsody (2004)

Vera Farmiga

Where is the love: I think that Vera Farmiga is pretty underrated, and I like her. Very subtle, but she can totally rock her roles. I must say, she can get pretty creepy sometimes cause she can play cooked a little too well.
Best role: Norma Louise Bates in Bates Motel. Because really – she nails that performance each and every time. Slightly too realistic sometimes.
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: Breaking and Entering (2006)

Amanda Seyfried

Where is the love: What I enjoy about Amanda Seyfried is that she’s a little different. I don’t know why she would appeal to me as an actress, but she does. I have enjoyed watching her play the super special and slow Karen in Mean Girls, and her general progression on to other roles, bigger, better, meatier, is something I have liked. She always does the best with what she has, and even when she is in a crappy movie, she always stands out.
Best role: Karen Smith in Mean Girls (2004)
The one even she couldn’t convince me to see: The Big Wedding (2013)

Review: Don Jon (2013)

“Movies and porn are different, Jon. They give awards for movies.”
– Barbara

Jon “Don Jon” Martello Jr (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is an attractive, egotistical and shallow porn addict. An addict though he does not know it. His friends consider him to be a Don Juan of the modern day. He sleeps with a lot of women, though he still watches a lot of porn, being of the opinion that it is superior to sex. He loves his family, his car, his body, his home, his friends, his church, his girls and his pornography, though not in that order exactly. One night out he meets a girl and she is just gorgeous for him in every which way. He flirts with her and makes out with her but she leaves to go home at the end of the night without him. He is not deterred, and picks up another girl and goes home with her. After their night is spent together, he goes and watches pornography. The real deal simply doesn’t live up to that which pornographic dreams he has.

“Since last Sunday I had sexual relations out of wedlock two times. I also watched pornographic videos and masturbated seventeen times. For these, and all the sins in my life, I am sorry.” – Jon

Doing something completely out of character when he cannot stop thinking about the mysterious girl at the club that turned his one night stand down, he starts asking around about her and learns that her name is Barbara Sugarman (Scarlett Johannson), and gets hold of her to meet him for lunch. The two circle around each other, both being the unknown quantity. They are both attracted to one another, but she refuses to sleep with him and that be all the relationship is about. The two start dating one another, and Jon needs to make do without sex for more than a month. Jon is also taking classes at night so that he can get a more stable job than that from the service industry. Jon introduces Barbara to his mother Angela (Glenne Headly), father Jon Martello Sr (Tony Danza) and sister Monica (Brie Larson). The family seems to like her a lot. Barbara starts changing a lot of things in Jon’s life, and he allows it to happen, but does not see the bigger picture.

“You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life.” – Jon

The couple finally sleeps together, though Jon is disappointed with the result. He was expecting the sex to be the best thing ever. After they are done, naturally he gets up to watch porn. Barbara catches him and freaks out, leaving Jon to lie to her about it being a joke email that one of the guys sent to her. Calming down, she believes him and things go back to normal. Jon starts to hide his tendency to watch porn, getting his fix where he can. At college he meets a woman named Esther (Julianne Moore), emotional and very strange. She catches him watching porn but does not judge him. The two eventually enter into a very strange friendship, and Jon starts confiding his secrets to her. Jon and Barbara’s relationship is far from perfect, and the longer they are together the more controlling she becomes, and he allows it. She puts him down about the things that he finds to be personally satisfying, and eventually their relationship starts to splinter, though Jon is in love with her. Discovering porn in Jon’s browser, Barbara calls an end to their relationship, though Jon will not tell anyone.

“If you wanna lose yourself, you have to lose yourself in another person. It’s a two way thing.” – Esther

Will they be able to find a way to work past their differences? Will Jon stop lying to Barbara about the porn? Will Jon find a way to enjoy sex as much as he does pornography, or is that something that is just never going to matter? Will Barbara be the woman to teach him that women are there for more than just sexual gratification and the stroking of the male ego? Will Jon complete his college classes so that he has an education behind him?

Don Jon earns a 6.5/10. This really was not a bad outing for Joseph Gordon-Levitt, and again he showcases his talents here, taking it up a notch to include directing, too. I enjoyed the movie for what it was, giving another look at how some people may perceive porn to be, as well as the insane track record Jon had created for himself, and how incredibly selfish and dissatisfied he is no matter what. The way he changes tack and attempts to go on the straight and narrow to get laid in a more satisfying way had me laughing. Scarlett Johannson was brilliant to play Barbara, and she, too, was as selfish as her male counterpart. It seemed a match made in heaven, though naturally, nothing was changed too much from him. Listening to Jon defend his pornographic enjoyment was funny and sad both at the same time, because it truly highlights that he is an addict. I had to laugh at how/where Jon exercised his penance according to the Catholic Church – in gym while working out. Also, the way it shows how Jon really did love the church, and considered it to have a huge impact in his life, just to learn that he is a mere member to them, nothing more, nothing special. Monica says nothing throughout the film, but when Brie Larson was utelised to say what was required, it carried so much more impact. Julianne Moore was again worth checking out, she was emotional and she carried her character well. I thought she was well cast, though there were so many complaints. Definitely not a movie I would say is family friendly viewing, it is not too bad to check out when you have the time.