So when I checked this out, I was surprised that there was actually a scene that I enjoyed so much that I could make a post from it. That scene was the one at the pool, and it was fantastic. We get all the crazy neon lights, we get Bonnie Taylor belting Total Eclipse of the Heart while one of the potential victims of these strangers decides he has had enough, and decides that he is going to stop toying around and just go for him. It all just comes together really well.
Only Lovers Left Alive is a strange little film. Dark, comedic, sweet. Adam is a reclusive, depressed musician whose wife of the last few centuries reunites with him, and their odd but perfect little relationship gets some rejuvenation. A scene that stands out as something truly beautiful is this dance that the two shared after Eve chastises Adam for his self obsession, and not seeing the bigger, more beautiful things in an endless life.
“I just don’t think that Brooke could’ve done this. Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands, they just don’t.” – Elle Woods
SYNOPSIS: Elle Woods, a fashionable sorority queen is dumped by her boyfriend. She decides to follow him to law school, while she is there she figures out that there is more to her than just looks. – via IMDB
Yes. The nostalgia man. The nostalgia. I cannot tell you how many times I watched the silly movie growing up, and I have no regrets. I decided the other day to trip down memory lane as rewatch Legally Blonde, and I am glad I did. It is a silly fluffy film for sure, but it has heart, some spunk, and quite a solid message to it, and all this makes for an enjoyable watch.
Reese Witherspoon is the perfect Elle Woods. Like seriously, she just pulls of that totally ridiculous blonde with all the aplomb you would hope that goes with it. She comes across as a totally shallow, brainless airhead, and yet she is not slow. She is just interested in other things – like makeup, beauty, fashion, hair care, and her handbag dog. I love how sassy she is, too, and she has some really priceless lines (like getting into Harvard not really being that hard xD). But when her asshat boyfriend, Warner Huntington III, rips the rug out from under her, Elle goes above and beyond to win him back, and instead proves to the world that she is more than the stereotypical dumb blonde.
Disclaimer: check your brain at the door before you head in for this. If you try to take this too seriously or apply this all as happening in real life, you are going to be in for a bad time. Reality suspension, to be sure. Now, back to the movie. Harvard changes Elle, and in a good way. She gains more confidence than ever before, and feels like she is useful and applies herself, she makes a difference. She also makes real friends that side, and watching Witherspoon’s Elle and Jennifer Coolidge’s Paulette together is something else altogether. I quite enjoyed the little awkward side story between Paulette and the delivery guy, and I thought that Luke Wilson’s Emmett was terribly sweet. I also really liked how much heart Legally Blonde brought to the table, and the strong messages peppered throughout it.
Legally Blonde is a charming, light, fluffy film that tackles some strong issues and actually has quite a good, solid message that it conveys. It also helps that it is really fun and has moments that will stick with you (I mean who is in a hurry to forget the ludicrous bend and snap?!). Also, it’s totally nostalgic, and that wins points for me. It’s such a chick flick, this cannot be denied, and is cute in that slightly sickening way, but you gotta love it.
“We are dealing with a monster from a bygone era.” – Preston Packard
SYNOPSIS: A team of scientists explore an uncharted island in the Pacific, venturing into the domain of the mighty Kong, and must fight to escape a primal Eden. – via IMDB
I finally got to this, and I must say that I was more impressed than I expected to be. While Kong: Skull Island has some issues, if you don’t overthink it and just go in for what it was made for (pure entertainment), you are bound to have a pretty good time. I quite enjoyed myself throughout.
I had quite a good time with the humour, which was cheesy at times, but every now and again had a good, sharp snap to it. I also absolutely loved the soundtrack, which was totally right up my alley, and worked with this. I think the movie touted quite the impressive cast, though some of them were underused. None of them were actually given a character to really chew on, but they all served their purpose of bringing the story of Kong to life. I thought Hiddleston to be a good ex-military type, Jackson played who and what he always plays, Larson was solid (as is to be expected), and it was a treat to see Reilly here.
I did not enjoy the romance that was squashed into this (I could totally have done without it), and I must acknowledge that the movie had some super dodgy effects at times. Also, just don’t overthink it, because this is a movie to entertain, not to be picked apart like The Godfather or something. Kong was really cool, and I totally enjoyed his scenes. Those icky-ass monsters on the island that Kong protected everyone from served their purpose – to be gross as hell. Ewwww. There were also plenty fight scenes, and all were done quite well – exactly what they needed to be, which is a blockbuster action film. If that’s what you are going in for for Kong, then that is exactly what you are going to get.
Anyway, there isn’t really much to say about Kong: Skull Island other than it is quite a bit of fun and I thoroughly enjoyed myself. I had a few laughs, there were some cool fight sequences, a great soundtrack to carry it all, and decent performances from the cast. It’s seriously not a bad movie to while away some time with.
“I’ve seen bickering and family quarrels and mysterious trips at night, and knives and saws and ropes, and now since last evening, not a sign of the wife. How do you explain that?” – Jeff
SYNOPSIS: A wheelchair-bound photographer spies on his neighbours from his apartment window and becomes convinced one of them has committed murder. – via IMDB
So I finally, finally watched this. I quite liked Disturbia when I saw it, and learned after the fact that it was based on Rear Window. I have vowed for years that I would get to this, and it has finally happened folks. I am so damn proud of myself. That being said, let’s talk about the movie, a film I particularly liked for a variety of reasons and can finally understand why it is so revered.
Rear Window faces the challenge of taking place in pretty much one place. I am not usually bothered by this even remotely, provided that the story is solid and there is method to the madness. One set is fine with me. This is a prime example of how to handle a single area. You are constantly wondering about Lars Thorwald and all that Jeff is seeing, wondering if there really is an issue, or if Jeff is so bored from sitting there the whole time and his mind is getting awfully creative. The performances from both the stunningly gorgeous Grace Kelly and James Stewart are exceptionally important for the implementation of the film. Because we essentially only have one area the story is taking place in, their chemistry is important, as well as the delivery of their roles. You buy into their obsession – it starts slowly with Lisa, initially dismissive, and then they are hooked, both of them. This obsession also forces them to come together more – they are also so into each other and dancing around it because Jeff is a fool that thinks Lisa is just some finicky fashionista with no real depth. Idiot.
I enjoyed the dynamics between Jeff, Lisa, and Stella. I was not overly keen on Detective Doyle and his distinctly sexist views on things, but it must also be noted that this movie did touch on feminism. Lisa is a strong, independent woman who totally does not fit the mould Jeff would like to place her in, and Stella is also quite the entertaining woman. I also truly appreciated the dialogue of the film – it is fast, witty and sharp.
The way that the movie was shot is also impressive – the voyeuristic feeling you get while Jeff watches the courtyard and the neighbours lingers. It really comes across as curious, and then moves right into creepy territory, which adds to the suspense and unease you feel when watching this, which is awesome. It is masterfully handled. The runtime for this is rather long, but you never feel like time is being wasted while sitting around and watching it. Instead you are hooked from the off and desperate to see what happens.
Rear Window is a rewarding watch, something I can say I am pleased to have finally gotten to. It is masterfully created, the suspense sets in from the off, it is visually appealing to watch and carried by fantastic performances from our lead. It is engaging and fascinating and well worth the look see.
SYNOPSIS: A mere 200 yards from shore, surfer Nancy is attacked by a great white shark, with her short journey to safety becoming the ultimate contest of wills. – via IMDB
The Shallows, ah yes. The movie that was loved for all sorts of Blake Livel’y ass reasons. I finally got to check it out, an animal villain movie can really be good, especially if it’s a shark. They fascinate me, though I am properly terrified of them. Seriously guys, majestic but scary as all hell. Ryan brought this to my attention a while ago when he announced it was coming, and again when it was released and he reviewed it. It seems we saw pretty much eye to eye on this one!
Anyway, The Shallows boasts a ridiculously thin plot, which is sort of okay for the type of film it is. We need to know enough about Nancy to root for her, but we don’t need enough for it to be a drama. We want shark action! Speaking of, that shark action was present in abundance, and I loved it. It was so over the top, so insane, so hilarious, you couldn’t help but enjoy it. Don’t expect too much from this movie, and it will be great popcorn entertainment.
That shark was cuckoo, I want to say this right off the bat. Keith billed The Shark as Best Villain in his Annual K&M Random Movie Awards, and this shark was insane. The concept of being trapped in the ocean with this shark who is actively hunting you is terrifying. The movie manages to drive home that scary factor, and there were a few times where I found myself tensing up to see what would happen, no matter that this was a tad unrealistic. That shark was crazy vindictive, and played some major games with her.
Blake Lively wasn’t bad, she took the story where it needed to go, and was pretty well cast. I really liked her little bird companion, too. It was a really limited film, considering it was built on Blake Lively, a scary as heck shark, an injured bird, and a rock in the middle of the ocean. It managed to work well with less, this is true. The movie is littered with silly moments actually, when you look back on it, but it totally works for the movie, too. It’s ridiculous, but you can’t help but be entertained, even with the funky CGI. I don’t think it has much rewatch value though, to be honest. Again, not something to be taken too seriously, but you can have fun and a little tension thrown into the mix.
“It’s almost time, kids. The clock is ticking. Be in front of your TV sets for the Horrorthon, followed by the Big Giveaway. Don’t miss it. And don’t forget to wear your masks. The clock is ticking. It’s almost time.” – Commercial Announcer
SYNOPSIS: Kids all over America want Silver Shamrock masks for Halloween. Doctor Daniel Challis seeks to uncover a plot by Silver Shamrock owner Conal Cochran. – via IMDB
There was a lot of this:
And not enough of this:
What the fuck?! I’m sorry, I can’t even be civil about this! What the hell was the meaning of this?! This is the only movie in the Halloween canon I haven’t watched (I have seen all the Michael Myers ones), so when I popped this in, I thought I was getting a new film on Mikey. Well, no. I guess not. I spent the next 100 minutes having my teeth kicked in. Like, you know when a movie is so insulting you are actually offended when it is over? That was this hunk of junk for me. My husband (who luckily did not have the misfortune of watching this crap with me) spent the rest of the night laughing at me and my shock, horror, and incredulity that I had actually watched something this useless. This is Shitfest bad! Gosh! Okay, let’s even forget that there is no Michael Myers, and just go by the merits of the film – it still blows. I really tried to like it (because I love old school horror, so initially I was not phased by Myers being absent – this still had potential). There was this ridiculous “romance” squeezed in, which I think was just there to cover some sex for the movie (no jokes). The relationship was really creepy and forced, too. The movie had no idea where it was going, and stumbles all over the show while trying to find its feet. Sadly, that meant I was stumbling with it. It takes forever to sort of uncover what the bullshit story line was for this, and it is filled with superbly unlikable characters, so it is glaringly obvious that there is no solid story line because you don’t even like these people enough to chill with them while you figure it out. The writing is absolutely godawful, and there was so much illogical crap going down at any given moment, I just couldn’t anymore. Like, I see what they were going for here, but there was just way too much wrong with it. Just because this movie tosses in a few scenes of the last two Halloween movies in it on the TVs in this movie, does not mean I am okay with it being in the franchise, Let’s talk about the last bit of this movie – how many fucking times can it try to kill this guy and have him escape?! I know that is a common theme for horrors – but this surpassed the average rate exponentially. The only redeeming quality of this movie is probably the score, it’s actually really good. Anyway, useless movie that is bad even if it wasn’t ill placed in the Michael Myers canon, and one that I would highly recommend you skip.
“Some people say there’s a balance to everything. For every life, there’s a death, for every death, there is a life. But the introduction of life that was not meant to be, that can invalidate the list, force Death to start anew. You have to follow the signs… Kimberly.” – William Bludworth
SYNOPSIS: When Kimberly has a violent premonition of a highway pileup she blocks the freeway, keeping a few others meant to die, safe…Or are they? The survivors mysteriously start dying and it’s up to Kimberly to stop it before she’s next. – via IMDB
So, here we are. Final Destination could have been a standalone film, but studios decided it would be best to create this huge franchise from it, and here we have the next installment. Definitely still one of the better sequels to watch, and it was pretty cool to see AJ Cook outside of Criminal Minds, though I love her there. The story is a little shakier in getting started as opposed to its predecessor, but it gets into the swing of things quick enough with plenty gore and blood to fittingly accompany the film. The film was never really going to showcase any deep, in depth characters, but it tried some clumsy attempts to get there. Too many annoying people, and the same “this is BS” argument is getting really old. Bringing Clear back was also something that worked in favour of the film, as it gave us a link to the first one, a character we knew and could root for, who gave the movie the edge because she’d beat the game before, even though it had cost her dearly, and she lives in a padded cell. Incidentally, this gives rise to a whole slew of other questions I just don’t even know how to answer – firstly, electronics in a padded room = fire, secondly, why no food poisoning? Death on vacation? You get the gist of it. Anyway, there are some pretty inventive deaths scattered throughout here to feed our bloodlust, and the story takes a new spin on how to fool and escape Death, so at least they were still pushing for originality. The effects and CGI are, again, a little sketchy, but it’s alright, sort of a trademark for these movies. I think these movies are really fun for a movie night with friends – popcorn, gore, spans to laugh at.
“As the sound of the playgrounds faded, the despair set in. Very odd, what happens in a world without children’s voices.” – Miriam
SYNOPSIS: In 2027, in a chaotic world in which women have become somehow infertile, a former activist agrees to help transport a miraculously pregnant woman to a sanctuary at sea. – via IMDB
Well, well, well. I didn’t think I would dislike this movie as much as I did, as much flak as I may get for this. It came in recommended from my neighbour, though he said that there were a few scenes that the whole film basically hangs on. I didn’t realise that this movie had this mad love surrounding it and critical acclaim and all, and I went in relatively blind in terms of plot. It was evident in the first fifteen minutes that I was not going to enjoy it. I hated the camera work, it was jumpy and all over the show and gave me a headache. Then there was the dialogue, and I am sorry, there is nothing that will change my mind on the fact that I thought it was horrendous and awkward and didn’t flow right. There were more irritating characters than you could shake a stick at and the world may love Alfonso Cuarón but this was just not that great. It felt incredibly long, and I was ready to start bawling when I was sure we were nearing the final third, only to find that we were barely halfway. What annoys me is the fact that it had quite a good premise. It was interesting, it had potential, there were things to do and places to go and instead all that potential was squandered, and littered with bizarre and highly unlikable characters and events and things don’t flow properly. I was expecting some awesome plot twists, but none were delivered as promised. It was utterly predictable, and I was underwhelmed by the fact that the infertility issue was never explored more. Also, that ending! After all my pain and suffering, that’s how it went? Ugh. There were a few scenes that were done well and some things that were beautiful, especially when you think about it, but there were others with really flawed logic (such as a dude pushing a car all by himself, containing two women, along a muddy country round with hills). I feel that the cast was underused, as well. Julianne Moore and Michael Caine are big draw names (for me, anyway), and not much was really done with them when you get down to it. I know this is a pretty harsh review, but I was no fan. At all. And then when I saw the rave reviews and ratings coming back I was sure that I had missed something completely, and I did give this movie a fair shot. Overall, I was really hoping for more and instead I was left with this bitter taste of disappointment, and that sucks. Really.
Hey guys. So today I have great pleasure today in welcoming Alex of Alex Raphael to my blog today with an awesome Sporadic Scene! Thanks a million Alex 😀
There is so much to be delighted in Groucho Marx’s one liners. He really did have a way with words. But for all his cracking one liners, he and his brothers really were gifted visual performers, homed by their time doing vaudeville. Here is one of my favourite film scenes from the 1930s comic satire Duck Soup. It features Groucho and his brother Harpo in the film’s most famous scene. Enjoy!
If you have a scene that you would like featured, drop me a mail at sporadiczoe@hotmail.com with a picture/gif/video of the scene and an explanation as to why (should you want to include it).
The Sporadic Chronicles 