Top Ten Movie Monsters

I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’ve grown up on a staple diet of horror movies for years. I love the stuff, though there are so many crappy films in the genre, no character development, and a slew of other problems. Irrespective of, there have been some great monsters as far back as I can remember, a whole bunch that stick with you no matter what.

I decided to do a top ten movie monsters list (how original, I know). Naturally this is going to be one of those lists where there is such a vast array of monsters to choose from it is going to be grossly limited. Naturally this is not the definitive list or anything, just a list of ten awesome movie monsters. Anyway, here goes!

Freddy Krueger (A Nightmare on Elm Street films)

I am a massive Freddy Krueger fan (but the old and original Robert Englund stuff, mind, not this new age crap). Freddy is just totally the one thing you don’t want lingering or entering any which one of your dreams ever. Freddy plays with his prey before all sorts of bizarre and messed up executions, and everything for him is darkly, comically funny, not to mention that scary glove he runs around with!

Xenomorph (Alien films)

I honestly don’t think that I need to explain this. These things are scary as hell. Plus two, Alien: Isolation is not particularly helping matters either.

Dr Satan (House of 1000 Corpses)

The hell? House of 1000 Corpses is a crazy watch, and it definitely oozes darkness and horror. Something that was in no shortage throughout the film was messed up characters and devilish monsters. Dr Satan is no exception, he definitely gave me the chills! I would have a heart attack if I woke up and he was the first thing I saw!

Sam (Trick ‘r Treat)

I am a huge fan of Trick ‘r Treat, and I thought that Sam was one of the coolest creature things in a movie ever. Never talking, always just observing, waltzing around town, Sam is not someone you want to cross, or diss Halloween in front of.

Dementors (Harry Potter films)

While I was maybe not the biggest fan of these films (at all), and while they screwed the Dementors up more often than not (appearances and what they do), there was one of them that they got it right in, and knowing what I do about those things, they are nasty creatures you don’t want anywhere near  you at any time, ever.

The Witch King of Angmar (The Lord of the Rings trilogy)

I think you are all familiar with my love of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. I talk about it everywhere, as much as possible. High time to be watching it again, I think. Anyhow, the Nazgûl are terrifying monsters, really eerie, but the Witch King of Angmar takes the crown (he he) for this again because he is badass, scary, strong, powerful, backed by dark magics and forces and relentless to boot.

Lycans (Underworld films)

While some were not a fan of Rise of the Lycans, I thought it was a really fun movie, and I loved getting some more back-story on the Lycans. Besides that, I thought they looked really badass and cool in here, and they were awesome overall. An honourable mention here would be the werewolves in Trick ‘r Treat, apparently they were done by the same studios that did the Lycans in Rise of the Lycans.

Bagul / Mr Boogie (Sinister)

Because what the hell… that’s all. Didn’t expect to get something that packed this much punch from something like Sinister, but hey, I thought it was pretty good!

The Thing (The Thing)

Any one of the things in this movie. Come on, they were absolutely nasty, and could become anything, though the procedure was absolutely disgusting!

Zombies (Dawn of the Dead 2004 remake)

Because seriously… if zombies weren’t bad enough, let’s make them run like hell. Nope, heart attack waiting to happen.

Review: The Perks of Being a Wallflower – Stephen Chbosky

Charlie is a fifteen year old kid who does not fit in anywhere. Getting in touch with a friend he can write to, Charlie starts to spill all of his emotions and experiences. He is lonely, he is an outsider and that is just how things are. Soon he starts high school, but nothing really changes. He misses his best friend, Michael, who committed suicide a year before that, and is struggling to deal with that. Charlie battles severe depression daily. One day he takes a bold step and befriends Patrick “Nothing” and his stepsister Sam. Soon he feels like he is finally a part of something, and that things will not be so bad. Patrick and Sam are both seniors, and at the end of the school terms will hopefully be moving on to their respective colleges.

Charlie is rather taken with Sam, though he is firmly told that she is too old for him. Charlie is alright with that, and gets involved with Sam, Patrick and their friends. He becomes a part of the group. Things are slightly better for him now that he has people. Charlie’s English teacher, Bill, gives him plenty of books to read and to write papers on. Not for school, but for them, and Charlie takes to the task with gusto. He deals with his strange family, and that his sister is seeing a guy that hit her. Ultimately he discusses it with Bill, and Charlie and his sister have issues when the school contacts Charlie’s parents about it. Just like that they are on opposing sides, though Charlie only wanted to help. Sam starts seeing a guy named Craig, and it crushes Charlie, though he will step back and let he be happy. Patrick is dating a guy named Brad from school, who is also the quarterback. Everything is moving along smoothly, and Charlie likes this. With the group, though, Charlie starts doing things that are out of character, things that are new to him, such as smoking and drugs, though it all seems to be alright at the time.

Charlie deals daily with having lost his favourite aunt in the whole world, Aunt Helen. Charlie misses her gravely and feels responsible every day for her death seeing as she passed away going to get him his Christmas present. Charlie’s birthday is on the 24th of December, so every year around that time he is relatively depressed. His brother has returned home from college for the Christmas holiday, and Charlie is happy to have everyone together again. Shortly after the new year begins, Charlie has an issue when he somehow ends up dating Mary Elizabeth, one of the girls in the friendship group. Sam is thrilled for them, and everyone seems happy, except Charlie. Mary Elizabeth soon becomes an issue, and Charlie shakes her in the worst manner possible: by kissing Sam when Patrick dares him to kiss the most beautiful girl in the room. Soon Charlie has no friends anymore, and Sam is furious with him. Slowly but surely he is losing his grip on reality, and at a bad time, too, considering his sister needs his support now more than ever. While split from the group, Charlie learns that Patrick and Brad have broken up, and he wishes he could console Patrick. When a fight breaks out at school between Patrick and all of Brad’s friends, Charlie finally decides to step up, no matter what the group wants. His courage has him taken back into the good graces of the group. His psychiatrist, however, keeps scraping away at his past, and it makes Charlie nervous.

What is the psychiatrist looking for? Is Charlie’s drug use affecting his emotional threshold, too? What happened in Charlie’s past? What will he do when his friends move on to college and he is left alone? Will Charlie be able to find more of himself now that he is growing more confident in that ability? What lessons will Charlie learns from  his older friends?

I must honestly say that this is one of the few times that I believe the movie was better than the book. That is truly a rare occasion for me. I was impressed with this book, but it just lacked the kick that the movie gave it. The movie was a very loyal adaption of this book, and while it left some things out and altered others, overall the experience was similar. I liked how The Perks of Being a Wallflower was written as a letter style the whole way through, like a collection coming together. I enjoyed hearing how Charlie saw things, and I felt sorry for him. I thought it was better that Michael’s suicide was addressed better in the book, I thought it was something that was grossly overlooked in the film. There was some more character development here, but not an awful lot more than I already knew. The book is a quick, short read, too! One thing that really grated on me throughout was how much Charlie cried. Eventually I couldn’t even feel for him, I was just like wow, getting a little extreme here.

Review: Gone – Michael Grant

Gone #1

One regular day gets upset like nobody could have dreamed of when every single person in Perdido Beach fifteen and over just ups and disappears. Gone, no question about it. There is no explanation, and soon kids go into panic states when they realise that all the adults are gone, they have no internet or cellular reception and they are truly alone. Sam Temple and his best friend Quinn Gaither seem to take on the role of figuring things out. Sam is holding things together much better than Quinn, and manages to have his crush, Astrid “The Genius” Ellison, become a part of his group. Astrid, however, is desperate to find her autistic little brother Little Pete, and the group looks everywhere for him. At a hotel, they come across Edilio , who joins their group, and has also seen the same thing that they discovered: there is a wall that surrounds Perdido Beach. The group heads up to the nuclear power plant where Astrid’s father worked to see if her brother is not there seeing as he may have gone to work with their father.

Astrid is awfully uncomfortable at the plant, though they find Little Pete rather quickly. Sam is desperate to hide something about himself: he has the mysterious powers to shoot balls of light from his hands, though he does not know how to do it or control it. He met another girl that tragically passed that seemed to have the ability to create fire. Sam and Quinn are fighting with each other terribly. Upon the return to Perdido Beach, they see that a motorcade has driven into town, and an exceptionally charismatic Caine Soren of Coates Academy soon talks the town into electing him their new leader. However, Sam is sure that something is off. Everything was far too staged, and the people that he has brought with him, particularly his enforcer Drake Merwin, are scary. Caine soon sets about changing the way the kids are living. Howard, one of the local bullies, termed the occurrence the FAYZ, which is to say the Fallout Alley Youth Zone.

Caine brings crazy measures into effect, and Bette, a young girl, dies when she is beat to death for showing her powers. Caine himself seems to have the strongest powers, and rules quickly and effectively due to fear. Another girl named Lana Arwen Lazar is stuck out in the desert after her grandfather’s truck overturns when he disappeared. After almost dying due to her injuries she makes the discovery that she is able to heal, and finds a nice little place out in the desert to hide. When making a trip to the mine to get a car to take her back to Perdido Beach, she is attacked by talking coyotes who take her to the Darkness, which mysterious presence wishes her to teach the coyotes how to hunt and kill humans.

Sam, Astrid, Edilio and Little Pete are on the run after Quinn betrayed them all, leaving the freaks to be taken care of. Sam manages to escape, and Astrid is miraculously still alive due to Little Pete having saved them after Drake smacked her around. He, too, has the powers, and awfully strong ones at that. Caine has discovered that Sam is his brother, and the two do not see eye to eye. It seems that after Sam’s escape that it will be inevitable that the two battle it out for the allegiance of the FAYZ children. The biggest issues though is that they are both so close to fifteen and disappearing, and Caine is putting all his resources into figuring out a way to prevent it. Lana runs into Sam and his group on the run, and they think they have it made now that they have a healer.

Sam intends to return to Perdido Beach and fight his brother for their freedom. Caine may have other bullies on his squad, such as the scary Diana and incredibly menacing Drake, but will they be able to continue if their fearless leader ups and leaves? What will happen when Sam and Caine come face to face? Are they both going to disappear like all the other kids the moment they turn fifteen? What exactly happened to have caused the FAYZ? Will Sam and his ex-best friend Quinn ever sort out the hell that they have been through and recover their friendship?

You know what? I don’t even care if that is too harsh. I read these specifically because I was told that if I enjoyed The Hunger Games and Divergent trilogies this would be right up my alley. People that make those statements must be on drugs. I knew we were off to a ridiculously bad start when everyone over the age of fifteen disappeared. What does that leave us with? A bunch of bloody rugrats. What am I supposed to do with that? Not only that, the story progresses at a silly pace, and the content is absurd. For instance, not only was I suffering through pages about a bunch of pubescent worms, there were freaking flying snakes and talking coyotes and seagulls with super talons and crap. I almost thought I could deal with it until these puny kids started throwing each other around like pinballs, shooting lights out of their hands, “scanning” other for powers… the town was taken over by a bully and later dethroned by a much more intelligent bully, who happens to (eeeek, plot twist!) be our leading Sam’s long lost brother and crap. None of these useless lumps could drive and they were all squeaky and spineless. If I have to read the word “brah” one more time I was going to fatally wound someone. Not even done yet. We have tiny kids looking after even smaller kids, there were more Potter references than you could shake a stick at (really making you wonder if this book wasn’t riding on the glory of someone else’s coattails) as well as Lord of the Rings, the lamest attempt at humour and nicknames, the most unrealistic settings, fourteen-year-olds declaring their absolute and undying love to one another… I don’t know, there was just nothing that I could take seriously. When I started I thought that the characters were just a wee bit too young for me to get on board with, and then this just went horribly wrong. I just… don’t do this to yourself, even if someone compares it to The Hunger Games or Divergent trilogies… damn.

Review: Taken 2 (2012)

“I have to find them… and bring your mom back. And then I have to make sure these people never bother us again in our lives.”
– Bryan Mills

I actually wanted to watch this right after I finished the first one, and did not realize that so much time had passed in between my two viewings. I did not expect greatness from this, but damn, maybe a bit more than we got?

Retired CIA Agent Bryan Mills (Liam Neeson) continues his life since saving his daughter, Kim’s (Maggie Grace), life. His ex-wife, Lenore (Famke Janssen) and her husband, Stuart (Xander Berkeley), are pretty much through with one another since what happened when Kim was almost trafficked. Bryan steps in, trying to comfort Lenore as well as get Kim’s life together so she can get her license. He is unimpressed to learn that Kim has a boyfriend, Jamie (Luke Grimes). What he does not know, however, is that he is a wanted man after all the slayings he inflicted when looking for Kim. The families cry for vengeance, and are led by Murad Krasniqi (Rade Sherbedzija), the father of the man Bryan strapped to a chair and electrocuted.

Payback is a bitch

Lenore is upset when Stuart cancels their trip to China for Kim’s spring break, and Bryan offers that they come and stay in Istanbul with him after he has finished a job. They arrive before he decides to pack up and leave, surprising him. He is so thrilled. Soon, Kim starts playing matchmaker between her parents. On their way out one day, Kim says she will not be joining her folks. They leave together, laughing about how it will be, when Bryan notices a car tailing them. He gets Lenore out, but despite all his efforts, he and his ex-wife are taken. Bryan informs Kim of this via the phone just before it all happens, and urges her to seek safety. After all the slayings to save his daughter, this would have had to happen at some stage I guess…

Apparently rocking that stick

Kim becomes instrumental in helping Bryan escape from the people, as well as retrieving her mother. Bryan’s best friend, Sam (Leland Orser), who helped plan the surprise for Bryan with Lenore, needs to step up again and see how he can be of assistance to Bryan, but is not the most elemental in the plot. Bryan’s training kicks in full on and he starts devising an escape, even if the plan is rudimentary at best. Bryan needs to learn to not be so overly protective of Kim, and she becomes his greatest help. They need to recover their family and return home to safety as soon as possible.

Will Bryan be able to protect his daughter as well as recover his wife with minimal damage? How will he get rid of the Albanian gang if they are so intent on revenge?

With long teeth I am going to give Taken 2 a 4/10. I mean, I knew there was no ways it was going to be as good as the first (sequels rarely are), but I really expected a bit more than this. I don’t know, all of it was a bit wooden. Liam Neeson was, as always, great, but the rest of the movie did not really flow (even with him!). Not the dialogue, not the acting, and the story left a lot to be desired. Not even the action sequences helped this movie out at all. I don’t know, Taken was fantastic, and there was a lot of hype surrounding it, and there must have been much higher expectations for this one, but Luc Besson let us down, and could not live up to his predecessor. I hated how his daughter battled to drive an automatic back in the States but can suddenly rock a manual as if she at the very least has a defensive/advanced driving course under her belt. Pfffff. I could not buy into that logic, sorry. So no, this movie is actually one that you can go without seeing.