Review: A Court of Mist and Fury – Sarah J. Maas

A Court of Thorns and Roses #2

SYNOPSIS: Feyre survived Amarantha’s clutches to return to the Spring Court—but at a steep cost. Though she now has the powers of the High Fae, her heart remains human, and it can’t forget the terrible deeds she performed to save Tamlin’s people.

Nor has Feyre forgotten her bargain with Rhysand, High Lord of the feared Night Court. As Feyre navigates its dark web of politics, passion, and dazzling power, a greater evil looms—and she might be key to stopping it. But only if she can harness her harrowing gifts, heal her fractured soul, and decide how she wishes to shape her future—and the future of a world cleaved in two. – via Goodreads

Ugh. This book. I know my bestie Natasha is a ridiculously big fan of these books, and I really wanted to love them like her, and I thought A Court of Thorn and Roses wasn’t too bad, but then this hunk of junk rolled around. It grated on my last nerve from page one essentially. Remember all that sexy time Natasha said might put me off and I didn’t get what she was talking about in the last book? Well. It is ALLLLLLLLLLL here. Let me get into this stupid book already, and keep myself reigned in as much as possible.

THE FUCKING WHINING. Dear God, will it ever end?! Not once did Feyre stop moaning and whining and feeling sorry for herself in this, which chapped my ass. Almost as much as her constant vomiting. I am not kidding. All this character does it whinge and bitch and puke and have sex dreams/fantasies. Goodness gracious me. I had some hope for Feyre from the last book. Maybe not the greatest character of all time, but certainly not the worst. But here? Save mine eyes!

The book was also excessively long. Seriously. Maas could have lopped off two hundred pages easily and still told the same wheedling, stupid story. So much of this book is wasted on erotica. And not the good kind, either. The lame, silly kind, with some exceptionally questionable sex scenes/practices going on. Forest Fuck Fest, Tom! I know how you love that phrase! This is it! I don’t like to read erotica or a ton of sex scenes, I want a story more than I want to know about… okay, let me stop there. This conversation might become too graphic for words, and is so not the way I converse. Just know I was extremely unimpressed with the offering.

Aside from Feyre working on my last nerve, the characters are again shallow and flat in this book, and Tamlin turned into a real asshat in this one. Controlling and manipulative and abusive. That bastard did nothing in the freaking uprising of Amarantha, and he is treated like the conquering hero that gets Feyre as a prize? What? CONFUSED. But yeah. Also, it irritated me that he was essentially an entirely different character than in the first. The first he had flaws, but who the fuck is this guy?! Then there is the completely NOT SHOCKING development of the relationship between Feyre and Rhys.

Maas is also a crappy writer. Well, in this series, at any rate. Repetitive language, more ellipses than should be legal and more em dashes than you can shake a stick at. Seriously. And she constantly repeats certain phrases. I don’t know how many times she used the term “vulgar gesture”, but my eye twitched every time I read it.

Okay, I am actually going to stop venting here before this turns crazy. Needless to say, I hated this book. It took me about a week and a half to read it because every time I looked at my Kindle, a little part of me wilted and I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. But I am a completist and masochist and soldiered on. At least it is done now. I won’t lie, I have absolutely no motivation to pick up the next one. We will see if I get to the place where I wish to give Maas her last chance, but I don’t know. It seems my opinion is in the minority on this series, but I just don’t get the hype at all.

JB & The Chop Do: The Amityville Playhouse (2015)

Holy shit folks! We are back! The completists that Eric of The IPC and I are and all meant that there was no way in hell that we could leave this series unfinished! Even after the massive celebrations of ending that last piece of crap, this one made an appearance and we were all over it – there is no way this franchise will ever die! Keep your eyes peeled, we have so much more in store for y’all!

SYNOPSIS: Following the tragic death of her parents Fawn Harriman discovers she has inherited a theatre in the town of Amityville. She, along with 3 friends, decides to spend the weekend there looking the place over. Meanwhile one of her High School teachers begins an investigation into the village’s past and makes a connection with something that goes back beyond recorded history. – via IMDB

Well folks, who the hell knew that I would be back for more of this silly franchise? Well, me. Because I know the franchise blows (let’s not even pretend otherwise), but I am also someone who cannot leave something unfinished, so naturally I was back in action for this, and I do so love working with the Chop, so even if this was where we would begin (to end), I was on board. Even if it makes me the author of my own suffering.

So. Uhm. The Amityville Playhouse. Right. You know, I don’t usually like to shit all over a movie. It has to be really bad. Like, really bad. Especially when you can see it is a budget film and they were trying. But then there are others that are unforgivable. This? This is one of those. SO BAD. And not the so bad it rocks kind, either. Just plain down atrocious and awful.

There are many fatal flaws to this movie, and I think the biggest offender is the acting. Like holy wow. It was just so stuff. I mean, we have all seen movies/series with some sketchy fucking moves and work from those involved, but this? This is next level man. WOW. Again, not even laughable bad, just so bad I can’t believe that anyone let these poor people put something like this out o.O

The Amityville Playhouse takes itself waaaaaaay too seriously, which is wickedly embarrassing. Pair that with some of the worst dialogue I have ever heard (I actually cringed), awful characters, a stupidly pointless plot (like wtf was that even?!), and some of the slowest, self-centred teens I have ever seen and you get this steaming pile of crap. That dweeb boyfriend? He actually said: “I swear I will pin him down and take a dump on his face. What. The. Fuck. I was sure it couldn’t get worse. I was sure. I was also terribly mistaken.

The movie honest to goodness even tried to address the gay/straight thing here. Like AWKWARD and does not fit into the whole katoot. Hang on – they actually addressed the whole science vs. religion thing, too o.O There’s even a section on the issue of America, and the slaughter of the Native Americans. Ambitious fucking movie, I tell you!

I freaking hated the characters. Not just cause they were bad actors, but because, for instance, the lead was so whiny, and then there was her total dweeb of a boyfriend, and an utter, screaming, yelly bitch as the best friend (I just don’t even want to get into this faulty thing). There was so much useless aggression all over the show here, which did not help matters in the slightest.

Let’s take one second to address the ridiculous roars (were those lions? What the fuck was that even all about??) and then, of course, that score. That. Fucking. Score. That thing that never, ever once let up, that was the same few notes on repeat. It hurt me. It really, honestly, truly did. I think that was worst for me. Music and a score and all are supposed to complement a film, not make everything so much more unbearable.

I have to say, watching these kids, they are a freaking deadpan, meh lot. I swear to goodness, I had way more oomph as a teen. Never mind that, a weekend in a theater? Not a likely scenario, but you better believe we would have made the best of it! We are talking a hardcore party, a jol for days!

So… they are in the UK, and for shits and giggles these teenagers go over to the States to spend a weekend in the theatre? And the teacher skips over the lake as well, just for fun? WTF? Is that what happened? I have no idea! It made no freaking sense!

This silly movie was entirely and excessively too long. And it was flawed, damaged, and broken. It actually made me yearn for some of the earlier entries. Yes, I said that. This was bad. Everything about this movie was clumsy.

I swear, I got to the end and I was like:

And then my brain was like:

As if this franchise is ever gonna throw in the towel. EVER.

I just want to thank the Chop for being such an awesome collaborator to work with, and I am looking forward to future projects!

The ONLY reason I  ever bothered with this is because I’m a Completist and Zoë and I did a run on the entire franchise – well, and my OCD couldn’t just leave this dangling out there like a dong in the wind, so I rented it and immediately regretted this Terrible and Poor decision making on my behalf about four minutes into the movie. This fucking chick down here, with her fucking bangs, her twisty eyeballs and her fucking pimply chin:

inherits a fucking movie theater from her fucking dead parents. Turns out she lives in some Canadian province with her Canadian friends and her Canadian school teacher but the theater is in some town called Amityville so they hop in their Canadian cars and head south to check it out. These are five of the worst actors I have ever laid my eyes on and they deliver their lines as pathetically as possible. I can’t really come up with words to explain this but there’s this scene where the five of them are trying to leave the theater and the door is locked.  Imagine for a minute that there is only ONE door in the entire building that violates every fire code in America. Now imagine that you’ve been stuck in a room for eight hours listening to some boring man read you The Telecommunications Act of 1936. In your most bored, tired, uninspired voice, say these words with your friends:

I CAN’T OPEN THE DOOR. THE DOOR IS LOCKED.

WHO LOCKED THE FUCKING DOOR?

I DIDN’T LOCK THE FUCKING DOOR.

I’M SO SCARED. I’VE NEVER BEEN SO SCARED IN MY LIFE.

WE’LL NEVER GET OUT OF HERE. WE’RE GOING TO DIE IN HERE.

I CAN’T OPEN THE DOOR. MY HANDS ARE BLEEDING.

QUIT FUCKING AROUND AND OPEN THE DOOR.

THE DOOR WON’T OPEN. THE DOOR IS LOCKED.

WHY IS THE DOOR LOCKED? I’M SO FUCKING SCARED.

WE’RE GOING TO DIE BECAUSE THE DOOR IS LOCKED.

I’VE NEVER BEEN THIS SCARED IN MY LIFE.

There is nothing at all good about this movie and the end is so stupid you’ll want to punch yourself in the balls (or other) for watching it. If anyone ever tries to convince you to watch this, do everything you can to immediately shit your pants and take those shit filled underwear and ruggedly place them on whoever suggested this’ head.

And now, for e very special send off to this pitiful thing, here is an IPC reenactment of the famous door scene! Be careful, there’s lots of F bombs in there… so be sure to play it as loud as possible at your workstation so all of your colleagues can hear it!!

JB!! We did it!!! I can’t believe it!! UGH – what a fucking disaster of a franchise!! Who picked this shit??? I do love working with you but I am so glad this is over!!

Coming soon to a theater near you:

CRY CRY CRY CRY CRY CRY CRY CRY

#theflies #ohmygodtheflies

Rapid Review: Lovely Molly (2011)

“What ever happens, it wasn’t me.”
– Molly

SYNOPSIS: Newlywed Molly moves into her deceased father’s house in the countryside, where painful memories soon begin to haunt her. – via IMDB

So I couldn’t even remember where I had seen a review of this and decided to check it out. I found out after the fact that it was something that dear Eric liked a lot (this after I told him I was sure I had stumbled upon my next Shitfest entry – when is that happening again???). Well. Pretty much from the off I knew that there were going to be problems with this. And I mean a lot of problems. All good and well we get Half Sack back for something, but it does not mean something good will come for it. For one, I was no fan of the dancing between found footage and regular shot movie. Well, I don’t like found footage usually ever, at all, but really, it was pointless here. The movie was slow, and it never actually divulged anything. It set up for jump scares that never happened, but this wasn’t done successfully where it keeps you on the edge of the seat. Oh  no, this is done in the way where, finally, for half a minute, your interest is piqued for a moment, and then there is no payoff. Meh. Also, nothing was explained. Now, I am not one that likes too much revealed usually. Seriously, less is more at the best of times. I was all good for that, but then you look at certain incidents (a real rapey looking scene against a work wall, a priest dropping to his knees to eat out a naked girl on a porch) and all I can do is wonder why and how we got to this place. It doesn’t even make sense! Not to mention that the performances leave a lot to be desired, and the logic encountered in this film? Next level crazy I tell you! Now, something else that really got under my skin? The character inconsistencies. There is the dear husband, Tim, who seemingly adores his wife. They have no problems, they are happy, not once has there been alluded to that something might be wrong, so when we get to a random scene where he is, uhm, overly cuddly with the neighbour, it just doesn’t make sense at all. I could totally have gotten on board with the concept of her potentially being crazy or the house was crazy or there was some haunting, really, it could have been interesting but it was handled terribly here. I didn’t like any of the characters, so I couldn’t care for them. The movie also felt like it was only about a half century long. Ugh. So much wasted potential. I really thought it would be more (sorry Chop). I was peeved but oh my goodness, my husband was livid and hopping, ready to go out and decree that all filmmakers producing crap like this should be shot, and was ready to start with the guilty parties of this. Luckily, I talked him down. Luckily. He was more pissed about this than It Follows. I didn’t even see the whole “From The Makers of The Blair Witch Project and The Lord of the Rings” until later, but that second name dropping part just pisses me off – this is totally not in the same league. Don’t put it up there. Thank goodness I didn’t see that before I watched it. I am sure that it would have, if possible, just have made this worse than it already was. Somehow, I am sure of this.

Rapid Review: The Final Destination (2009)

“Something’s gonna happen, we are all gonna die! All right? ‘Cause there’s gonna be a crash!”
– Nick

SYNOPSIS: After a young man’s premonition of a deadly race-car crash helps saves the lives of his peers, Death sets out to collect those who evaded their end. – via IMDB

Holy. Shit. This movie. The acting. The graphics and effects! Next level, I tell you. Gosh, I think it is relatively on par with The Wrath of Paul Bunyan. Impressive as hell. These movies have a relatively simple recipe, they do. A big tragic accident gets witnessed/seen in a premonition, someone freaks out and saves some people, then people start dying in the order they are supposed to, the original freakee realises this and tries to save everyone. Unsuccessfully. Without fail. So while the movies are a rinse and repeat of one another, they are cheesy fun. Until this one, that is. This one is just so damn meh, I didn’t actually even watch it too closely, to be honest. It was also worsened by the fact that the graphics and effects were given front and centre stage, and they were nothing short of cringe worthy. Take a look at the poster. See how heavily they are marketing the 3D angle? Yes, so you can just imagine what it is that we got… the above gif is an example of some of the finer points of the sketchy effects. Ugh. I hated this movie. The acting was beyond godawful, the dialogue was next level dodgy, the characters were all immensely unlikable, the deaths weren’t even that creative, and this movie tried way too hard all the time, and it failed. Terribly. I really don’t know what else to say about this movie. It was bland, unimaginative, boring, terribly executed and stupid to boot. There was not saving it, not even normal bad horror logic, and it was unforgivable. Seriously, these movies could have just remained a trilogy, or could really just have been a single movie without a million sequels. But no, money was afoot, and the studios threw money into something that evidently failed. Horribly. Especially in the form of The Final Destination. This was just unacceptable. Over the past few weeks, it would seem that most of you wonderful readers are in agreement that this movie is the worst of the lot. Definitely followed by the fifth one. I think. Should we take a poll here to ascertain this? I think we should. Let me know what your favourite movie is in this franchise, I will post the results next week with the final one!

Sporadic Scene: Se7en (1995) – Sloth

So, let’s not even pretend that Se7en didn’t have an awful lot going for it, because it did. It had a great cast hunting a whacko serial killer on the run, exercising his right to recreate the Seven Deadly Sins. However, after finding corpse after corpse, there it the one discovery that gets the audience – and I think that Fincher executed this flawlessly: Mills and Somerset go into an apartment and investigate a terrifying, gross and mutilated corpse, and when they are right up there with it the corpse coughs. Yes, that’s right, cue plenty jumps and squeals.

If you have a scene that you would like featured, drop me a mail at sporadiczoe@hotmail.com with a link to the scene and an explanation as to why.

Review: The Covenant (2006)

SYNOPSIS: To the students of the Spenser Academy, the Sons of Ipswich are the baddest boys on campus. But that’s not all they share. The four friends also share a 300-year-old secret: they’re warlocks, the teenage descendants of a 17th-century coven of witches. So when the long-banished fifth son suddenly appears and threatens to kill their loved ones, they realize they must face their enemy in order to prevent him from stealing their powers and shattering the covenant forever. – via IMDB

Well, seeing as this was so bad I am going to turn it into something completely different.

One of the things that sucked on so many levels was how freaking terrible the CGI was. I mean bad, bad, bad!

Oki, so the balls of power…

Then there is the secondary cause of there being like no heat between male and females (like seriously) and far too much sexual tension resting between the dudes. Not particularly comfortable to sit through at all.

Looking at built mostly naked men is not something ladies normally complain about, but this was pretty homoerotic and said strictly no ladies. Plus really, they look so uncomfortable, and that isn’t sexy. And they look like idiots. And they didn’t tick the hot factor boxes. For me, anyhow.

Well, here was one scene I thought it was going to be more normal (as in maybe something between the guys and the girls or a standard shower scene at the very least). Turned out to be a super let down. Then read in the trivia that a lot of steam was added to the shower scene to obscure the nudity to score that PG-13 rating they so badly wanted. Sorry guys!

Then there was this shit… I mean fucking seriously??

Then there was the burning building… he looks so super fly!

I don’t know what you folks think, but if someone is in a serious fight, has power balls thrown at them, get flung out of burning buildings and all that bizarre stuff, would you think the suit would look so neat? I sure as hell don’t.

So I am going to move away from all of this now. I at least got to moon over Sebastian Stan in this. Let me tell you, he started fine, then the cheese was just an overkill, but it doesn’t take his pretty away!

I won’t even elaborate… but yum!

Pretty damn cute in uniform.

I would totally let him lope around a shower room looking like that…

More hmmmmmm…

There’s just a certain way to do demon eyes. While Sebastian Stan was freaking delicious, he lacked the attitude of Dean Winchester, and the backdrop of a decent show…

I had completely forgotten that I had seen this movie when it had came out and that it was so damn lame you can’t help but groan and facepalm throughout. I mean the movie kicks in with some White Zombie, and I am all like hell yeah… I am even prepared to skip over the incredibly dodgy text and effects on it. Whatever. I mean it’s got to be good if it opens with some Zombie, right? Right? Wrong. I think the best things about this film were the Zombie tracks and getting to watch the delectable Sebastian Stan. Outside of that, really?! What the hell?! It is so corny, and not the good kind, either, and so silly. My other half refused to put himself through this again (I was just thinking bring it, it will give me something to rag on), and was giving his two cents from the room for the entire duration, all degrading, all some serious mockery. He was dead on though. The dialogue was simply cringe-worthy, the outfits were absurd, the actors were not great, the plot was just… I don’t even actually know what that was, to be honest, and none of the characters were someone you could identify with. Then the whole thing of Sarah hearing about the Salem witch trials and how it ties in with the Sons of Ipswich and having her be all like “ooooooh creepy” – my eyes just went rolling around, I couldn’t help it anymore. It was hundreds of years ago. Extensive research has been done into it. Interesting, yes. Creepy, not so much. Or my mind is just too rational, I really don’t know. Also, so many things happened that weren’t explained, or later just brushed under the carpet. The Covenant boasts one of the most unsatisfying conclusions I have ever seen in a movie, and that is saying something seeing as I was so happy to have this movie end. It is not that bad that you want to kick your television to pieces and dump it outside, but it is bad enough to groan. Probably good for a rip off and a laugh with your friends if ever you are extremely bored or masochistic enough to test the waters. Have I mentioned the dodgy effects? Damn. This was just silly, not suspenseful, overly predictable and puerile. Skip it, skip it, skip it! If you were unlucky enough to have seen it, we can wallow about this together.

Review: Level 26: Dark Revelations – Anthony E. Zuiker with Duane Swierczynski

Level 26 #3

SYNOPSIS: In Dark Revelations, Steve Dark faces the most intricate, intense, and explosive case of his career. The killer calls himself Labyrinth, and the riddles, puzzles, and wordplay with which he announces his new targets have caused a worldwide media sensation. The case has already claimed a number of high profile individuals as victims-not to mention several government agencies, which have tried and failed to stop a growing global panic. But what point is Labyrinth trying to make? Who will be his next victim? It’s up to Dark to assemble a team from among the smoking rubble of the international crime-solving community, find Labyrinth wherever he may be, and put a stop to the mayhem, once and for all.

Can Steve Dark solve the biggest riddle of them all? Only time will tell. – via Goodreads

Ugh. Ugh, ugh, ugh. Ugh. Really now! This trilogy is just one of those that just disappoints at every turn. So far the best villain has been Sqweegel, from the first book, though a lot of things were just not right in that book. Then there was the sequel, which started with more potential and ended up being only slightly better than the first. Then there was this one, the final installment, and I was wondering if the game would be upped, if there would be a much more satisfying conclusion, some brilliant finale, something to tie up all the ten thousand loose ends dangling around all over. You can forget it. Really now. The villain was not difficult to guess, the ties linking everyone were not difficult to work out, so that left for a hollow experience. Not only that, this book becomes really repetitive and boring very quickly, so that ultimately this book feels like a really juvenile story because there is nothing that chills you or freaks you out, and the riddles are childish in nature. Then there is Steve Dark. This character, I tell you, not one that I enjoy. The sex again… Dark never initiates anything, but we are to believe that women are yanking their clothes off and throwing themselves at him at every single turn?! What are the writers trying to say with this, exactly? Like, meet him, fuck him, move on. It really pisses me off when you get that in a book, truly. It is annoying and crass and unnecessary in the novel. I have been waiting since the first book to hear what Dark would do when he found out about the Sqweegel DNA, and it turned out to be something that was overhyped and underwhelming. I did not watch the videos for this novel save the last, because the stupid book just ends and you have to go and watch the clip to see how it all really ends. You don’t even really need the clips to understand anything, but to have to watch a final one to end the story? Not cool. Defeats the point of a book. This book was just frustrating in the long run, running around in circles, flat and unappealing characters, a villain that had potential but didn’t work out too well by the end of it all, a writing style that certainly needs refinements, characters (Lisa Graysmith hem hem) just suddenly dropping away, though they were actual love interests… just a disappointing way to wrap things up. Really. At least it is all over now.

Rapid Review: Transcendence (2014)

“Once online, a sentient machine will quickly overcome the limits of biology. And in a short time, its analytic power will become greater than the collective intelligence of every person born in the history of the world.”
– Will Caster

SYNOPSIS: Dr. Will Caster (Johnny Depp) is the foremost researcher in the field of Artificial Intelligence, working to create a sentient machine that combines the collective intelligence of everything ever known with the full range of human emotions. His highly controversial experiments have made him famous, but they have also made him the prime target of anti-technology extremists who will do whatever it takes to stop him. However, in their attempt to destroy Will, they inadvertently become the catalyst for him to succeed-to be a participant in his own transcendence. For his wife Evelyn (Rebecca Hall) and best friend Max Waters (Paul Bettany), both fellow researchers, the question is not if they can…but if they should. Their worst fears are realized as Will’s thirst for knowledge evolves into a seemingly omnipresent quest for power, to what end is unknown. The only thing that is becoming terrifyingly clear is there may be no way to stop him. – via IMDB

What the hell man? Johnny Depp’s redeeming role… that’s what this was supposed to be. Instead I saw a drunk Jack Sparrow scientist in the beginning. However, he was massively improved by the end of the film. I was not a fan of the plot whatsoever, and it was incredibly sad to see such a great cast go to waste. I mean Morgan Freeman, Paul Bettany, and Cillian Murphy? Johnny Depp and Rebecca Hall? It was just such a disappointment overall, and I want to make mention of how stupid it all was. Meh. I feel like I wasted so much time here, and I will never get it back. I mean the reviews came back pretty negatively, but even though I was not necessarily excited to see it, I still wanted to see what all the fuss was about. I was hoping for something worthy or Depp’s talent. It started just fine, and then it just lost the plot. And not gradually, either. It’s like the ground opened up and it went into freefall. The script left a lot to be desired, although the plot progression was the one thing that was more sturdy than most other aspects of this. Plus there was Kate Mara, and I really don’t like her very much, so she just irritated me endlessly every time she came on screen. Depp only impressed me more towards the end – those of you who have seen this, I am sure you will agree that it was more of a call back to the older Depp style. Overall, the movie was ludicrous. I just could not slot in with what was going on at all, which is a pity. I really wish it had been something more.

Review: Under the Knife – Tess Gerritsen

Kate Chesne is a successful doctor. She loves her life, albeit a little lonely. One day, a routine operation goes awry. Part of the staff that performs surgery on Ellen O’Brien, a close friend and fellow nurse, something goes wrong in the operating room and Ellen dies on the table. Once an investigation is launched, Kate is soon served with papers suing for malpractice when evidence shows that Kate misread the EKG and killed Ellen on the table. Her life as she knows it is crumbling, and she is desperate to get it straightened out. She knows for a fact that there was nothing wrong with Ellen’s EKG, and that she certainly did not have a stroke before surgery.

Kate approaches the O’Brien family lawyer, David Ransom, intent on making him  hear her out, to hear the truth, that she did not make a mistake, that someone else did. The two are opposites from the very off, though she is immensely attracted to him from the off. David, on the other hand, has made it his life’s mission to sue and crush doctors at every available opportunity, and it seems that Kate is no exception. However, things soon start to happen that make him wonder if there is maybe not more to her story, that maybe there are sides she does not know. Kate receives some strange calls about Ellen’s death, and when searching for answers discovers another corpse, another nurse. The dead nurse seems to have a connection to another murder, and suddenly a murder seems like a theory for the OR, and not necessarily malpractice. David and Kate, however, are tiptoeing and dancing around each other, complete opposites but completely taken with each other.

Is Kate right? Is she being framed? Was there a misunderstanding? Did she kill Ellen on the table, even if just by accident? Will David take her through the wringer, crushing her just like any other doctor? What will happen between the two? Will they start thinking a little more straight if they are away from each other for a while?

Why? Just why? Right, bear in mind, the cover looked like it could present a decent medical thriller. I even (for the briefest of moments) thought that this could totally have been a book that Natasha would enjoy (you know, romance and the medical side – her cup of tea). But then it just spiralled. I had a sour taste in my mouth over the romance aspect that presented itself insanely early, but I was certain it couldn’t be the worst kind or anything. Oh boy, was I mistaken. I was dragged into one of those ludicrous novels where everything is about the heat of the moment, the desire burning all over their bodies, the lingering gazes, the mind running more rampant than a hormonal teenager and electrifying touches and blah blah blah. I was seriously unimpressed. I finished it (not a fan of starting books and not finishing – seeing as this one was only like 250 pages I figured I could hack through it – plus the internets was down at work and I had nothing else with me CRY CRY CRY). Really, I usually like Tess Gerritsen, but this was just awful. The characters were just wholly unbelievable, the names were so pretentious – I mean Jinx? David Ransom (a lawyer)? Pokie? I was unimpressed to the extreme. Not only that, the dialogue and writing style was just so corny and weak. This could have been a decent read if not for all the flaming desire and doomed relationship and crap that dominated only every damn page. I was not happy with the plot progression either. The story was forgotten, and it had the potential to be alright. Instead it got inundated by page fillers of lust and love. Pffffff. The cover is sort of a love/hate thing for me. 1 – I hated it because I ended up reading a junky book, but 2 – thank goodness, otherwise my colleagues would have had a proper laugh at me! I would not recommend this unless you are seriously, seriously into that type of romance novel.